While I was in the hospital, I was sharing a room with three other girls.
Sara
Deirdre
Samantha

I was aware of the conditions that each girl suffered from (more or less).
Sara was in the bed opposite mine. She was 19, very thin, covered head to toe in scars, and from what I gathered, she was extremely depressed and suicidal. I had spoken to her a few times and came to realise that she was a very nice girl. Very sweet and funny. All she really wanted was to escape from her life and get somewhere half-decent.
Over the weekend, she went missing for 48 hours. On Saturday, the 21st of June, she was found at one of the schools in this town. She had hanged herself.
I feel quite shaken by this. I can only imagine how her parents must be feeling. Her funeral mass is being held tomorrow morning at 11am, but unfortunately I cannot go. I have appointments to keep at the day hospital.
I intend to go into the church later on in the day to light a candle for her.

I may not believe in God, but a part of me wants to believe that there is somewhere people go when they die.
In the meantime, I shall have the image of a burning candle posted in my journal in her memory.



STOP RIGHT HERE

If you're going to tell me that suicide is cowardice, don't even bother to comment on this journal. You have no idea. How dare you judge someone for their actions when you cannot possibly begin to understand what they may be going through.