I had an appointment this morning to see my psychiatrist at 10:45am. So I arrived there, bang on time, and you know what? I didn't get seen to straight away. That's fine, I don't mind waiting a little bit.
I was there for two hours. TWO FUCKING HOURS.
And the doctor was highly unhelpful. I told him that I'm still getting severely depressed. Does he give a shit? Does he bollocks. I asked if he was going to change my drug load, and he replies: "Well you're already on the top dosage of all your medications so I can't increase anything. Come back to me in two weeks and we'll see if there's a change."
What a fucking arsehole. Honestly.

What am I meant to do now? All they seem to be doing is loading me full of drugs that don't work. Sleeping pills that take up to four hours to work, antidepressants that don't stop me from getting depressed, and anxiolytics that don't settle my nerves in the slightest.
The only drug that's working is the antipsychotic. Thankfully. I don't know where I'd be if it didn't work.

I may end up checking myself into the hospital if this keeps up. I'm tired of this shit. To quote Titanic: "It's like I'm standing in the middle of a crowded room screaming at the top of my lungs but nobody even looks up."
Nobody here cares. They're just pumping me full of drugs and hoping for something magical to happen. Hoping that it'll shut me up.

Maybe I'm beyond help.